Why Mums Need to Retreat
A growing number of mums are packing their bags, kissing their partners and kids’ goodbye, and going on Retreat. While many sign up for a Wellness Holiday looking for nothing more than a little downtime, most find they have gained a whole lot more by the time they return home.
Why Mums Need to Retreat
Our Wellness Expert at Shanti-Som looks into the reasons why mums need to Retreat and the long lasting benefits.
Mums are overworked
The average mum roughly gets about 17 minutes for herself every day, a study reveals.
Another study released by Welch’s looked at 2,000 American mums of kids between five and 12 years old, and found the average hours mums work per week is 98. As in the equivalent of two-and-a-half full-time jobs. This doesn’t come as a surprise because motherhood, while a source of joy and fulfilment, is a full-on 24/7 job. Daily life often allows very little time for dedicated self-care. Whilst we can do our best to schedule time for yoga, meditation, getting to the gym, or heading to bed at a decent time, the kind of deep rest and rejuvenation that comes with a week-long wellness retreat is something entirely different, and, something entirely needed, especially by mums.
Mum constantly carry Guilt
So-called “mum-guilt” is pervasive among mothers. It can strike at any time and can show itself in any number of “mum” situations. There are enormous expectations from society, media, family and friends about what mothers “should be like” and what we “should do.”
The guilt and shame pushes a mum into deep judgement of the self, a constant comparing to others (where the mom believes she consistently falls short), and persistent negative thoughts about the self. Mums hide these thoughts but often begin to believe they are true. Mothers then become their own worst critics.
Mums can have Anxiety and low Self Worth
The guilt and resulting feelings of shame drive feelings, thoughts, and behaviors and can show up in some of the following ways:
- Depression and anxiety: Mums start to feel down most of the time, have fatigue, anger, or intense, obtrusive worry, or low self-worth, among other symptoms.
- Negative thoughts. “I should not go back to work, because I am abandoning my baby.” “I am a bad mother.” These thoughts become beliefs, and self-worth decreases.
- Overdoing, overworking and overscheduling. Here we’re grappling with the mum’s belief that if a mum does more, and ignores the guilt, the better she will feel. But this behavior can lead to burnout and becoming physically unwell.
The Benefits of a Mums Retreat
Retreats encourage mums to enjoy healthy self-care activities that they might incorporate into their daily lives when they return home, such as yoga, meditation and nature walks. They encourage women to see themselves as an individual with passions and to come together to connect with likeminded people, and most of all to have a bit of fun!
Motherhood is so encompassing, albeit in a beautiful way, that it is easy to lose touch with who you are as a person in your own right without the ‘Mum’ label. Putting the needs of your family first often means that you go without. A Retreat enables you an entire week to check back in with yourself. You have the freedom to do as you please, when you please! Activities such as yoga and meditation invite you to dive deeper into your heart and soul. The space and tranquillity can feel strange at first, but soon, you will embrace the chance to just be you, to follow your own needs, and to fall in love with all that you are again.
Get some much-needed Sleep
Sleep is one of the most important factors for our health and wellbeing. As parents, sleep deprivation is extremely common, and can leave you feeling far from your best self. On Retreat, sleep is a priority. In your own private room, without any distractions or sound, you are left to slumber to your heart’s content! The deep stages of sleep is where the body does its most healing and detoxification. If you never reach these deep stages, it is common to fall ill frequently, feel stressed or anxious, or to hold onto excess weight and toxicity in the body. Head home with a new sleep cycle that you can prioritise no matter what!
Focus on Your Health
How many Mum’s out there tend to live on a diet that revolves around coffee, toast crusts and whatever is leftover from the kids?! Eating on the go and eating the limited foods your children will actually touch can mean that as Mums, our own diet and health suffers too. On Retreat, one of the highlights is having all of your healthy, gourmet, delicious and nutritious meals cooked for you and having the time to sit and savour every mouthful! A week of healthy food, spa treatments, yoga, deep sleep and activities in nature means you have the chance to put your health first. Boost your immune system, reconnect with the importance of looking after yourself, and head home with a new health focus to keep you inspired.
Many women can find spa treatments confronting because it involves putting yourself first and being deeply cared for by another person. It requires you to relinquish control and be open to accepting, without giving anything in return. As mothers, so much time is spent giving. Taking time out to receive is so nourishing and so essential. Giving yourself permission to surrender to massages, facials, scrubs and other spa offerings is your chance to fill up your own cup and really shower yourself with goodness.
Experience New things Again
Does your life feel a little like Groundhog Day? The routines of daily life can start to feel ever so repetitive after a while. When we get locked into a familiar routine, it becomes easy to become a little blasé with life. You lose that wonder for life and the excitement of new experiences. A Retreat moves you out of your routine and pushes your boundaries.
In a foreign land with new people, you start to feel alive and entranced by life again. The unpredictable nature of being somewhere new allows for surprise and spontaneity. As a mother, so much is about creating routines and maintaining order! Travel is one of the best ways to reconnect you with the magic of life and open your eyes to a much wider view of the world. Experiencing new places, having your breath taken away by new sights, and challenging yourself to try new things.
Return Home the Best Version of You
One of the most incredible things about taking time out for a Retreat is that is doesn’t just benefit you. It benefits everyone in your life. Having your cup full and feeling truly rejuvenated and alive gives you so much more energy to really be the best version of yourself. When we run on empty all the time, it can be hard to feel grateful for the little things. Life feels hard when we don’t have energy or time on our side. A Retreat enables you to be a better person, a better mother, a better partner, wife, friend, sister, colleague.
A Retreat also inspires you to take all of your newfound wisdom and tools back home with you. With a new perspective and fresh motivation, it can be much easier to prioritise that yoga class, to get the kids involved in helping you cook, or scheduling in that monthly day spa visit. A Retreat can be a delicious pause button, but it can also be a reset button. If your life and world feel unsustainable as it is, sometimes a Retreat is the perfect way to get back on track again.
It’s time to listen up mums – nobody will force you to take a Retreat. No one else will book you a getaway. Or force you to go to the gym. Or tell you to stop working late nights. Only you can shape the life you want to live!
And for any dads, son and daughters- treat your mum and show her your appreciation. Your mum will never admit it, but she needs a break. A real one! A Wellness Retreat is a wonderful Mother’s Day Gift that she will truly appreciate and return home being the best version of herself.
At Shanti-Som our goal is for all our guests to return home glowing, radiating, fully rejuvenated and connected to their inner light, passion and purpose. If you have any questions to find your mums Retreat Program, please contact us.